Captain Purplehead

Well, it seems that a self-professed guru of blogging and his buddies have put together the Irish Blog Awards. Well, in the tradition of the Judean People’s Front, I’m considering starting the Irish Awards for Blogging. Now, I’m not decrying the work done by Mr Mulley and his award-winning buddies… ok, that was a bit harsh. Apparently he puts a lot of work into the awards and that’s grand. Fair play to him and his apostles.
Right, the thing is this. Beaut.ie is a good site for tips on make up and stuff like that. I don’t personally have any need for it but I recognise it as a good specialist blog. Should it win Best Blog in Ireland? Well, no. If you’re looking at successful, well written and well presented blogs, then you must look towards Bock The Robber. Should he win Best Blog? In my opinion, yes he should but then I don’t read every blog out there so maybe I’m completely wrong on this. Scratch that. I’m not completely wrong because he should definitely be in the running. So why should he win it? Quality writing? Yes, that box is firmly ticked. Diversity of topic? Yep, there’s everything from cooking to arse-on-fire ranting there so that’s another box ticked. Presentation? I see nothing wrong with his presentation but I’ll freely admit that Beaut.ie probably shades it on that one but not by much. So now we come to readership. Bock leaves even the illustious blogging guru Mulley in his vapour trail in terms of readers. His figures are consistently high and that’s because it’s a quality blog.
No sour grapes here because this little site didn’t deserve to be nominated, so at least they got something right. However, if you take a look at my categories, I may be in with a chance.

Only one award has been decided upon so far so please submit anyone you think worthy in each category.

The Inaugural Best Blog Award goes to…….. BOCK THE ROBBER!

Again, this is the inaugural Awards thingy so please feel free to submit any category you want. In the meantime, congratulations to a very worthy winner.

I punished myself again by staying for five minutes to watch the Eurovision Late Late Show. Dana, Johnny Fucking Logan and Marty fucking Whelan pretended to know something about music. Why do we go to the bother of spending so much time and energy on something as fucking harmless as the Eurovision is beyond me. Watching that fucking fruitcake, Dana, say it’s not fair to give an honest opinion and Johnny going on about how big he is in Scandanavia was truly indicative of the car crash that RTE has become. Ryan Tubridy thinks Ireland needs to win the Eurovision to “lift the country”. As if I couldn’t find him pathetic enough! Jailing Bankers, Bishops and Politicians for fucking up the country is a start in lifting the country. Jailing murderers, rapists and general fucking scumbags in actual prisons is another good way to lift the country.
Anyhoo, after cringing at Dana singing her Eurovision song, All Kinds of Everything, I decided it needed to be updated to become more current. No more butterflies and fucking seagulls.

Scumbags and paedophiles
butterflies and bees
Thugs in pyjamas
with stanley knives
bankers laugh
Bertie’s naff
Priests think we’re fooled
all kinds of every scam remind me we’re screwed.

Ministers are incompetent
Bishops pass the buck
Gardai are frightened
The pope doesn’t give a fuck
Brian Cowen
Mary Coughlan
The Green party too
all kinds of every scam remind me we’re screwed.

Summertime
wintertime
spring and autumn too
Monday
Tuesday every day
is doom and gloom.
Chancers
perverts
the country’s in shite
sunshine and holidays
tough on the dole
Willy leaves
tossers grieve
for fuck’s sake we’re doomed
all kinds of every scam remind me we’re screwed.

Summertime
wintertime
spring and autumn too
time will never change
the way they screw you.

Bastards
Cowards
things of the Dail
Rapists and murderers
walk free and tall.
Flooded homes
Gormless gnomes
a golden handshake or two
all kinds of every scam remind me we’re screwed.
all kinds of every scam remind me we’re screwed.

Coming soon: Johnny Logan’s What’s Another Year rewritten and titled, Where’s My Lump of Gear.
Also: Why Me, Willy O’Dea.

Just found an excellent new blog. Just thought I’d spread the word. Check out Gombeen Nation

Whenever there’s a recession or a feeling of doom around, due to the incompetence of people who convinced you to hire them because they said they could do the job, part of the human condition is to crave entertainment. There’s a need to suspend all thoughts of bills and mortgages and job security, if only for a little while. It’s kind of like societies idea of a group hug. There is a need for quality live music and comedy and, all too often, the people whose responsibility it is to provide such entertainment believe that they know best. This is normally an incorrect assumption and is based on how they can get people into their premises without spending too much money.
There are some exceptions to this rule but they are normally the exceptions that prove the rule. So how do you fix something like this? You listen to your punters and you talk with musicians about what is possible. The reason this so rarely happens is because a lot of proprietors believe they know best.
The absolute exception to this rule is Foley’s Bar on lower Shannon Street in Limerick. If you decide that you don’t want to read any further, just go in there on any night and you’ll see quality live music being played in an unbelievable atmosphere. There is, however, a problem. The problem doesn’t reside in the venue but in the complete lack of support that is given to it in terms of funding. Drinks companies would prefer to go for the quick buck that is provided by sponsoring events in so called super pubs rather than take a look at a pub that slavishly supports good live music.
I’m not talking about some crusty fucker in a corner, triggering midi files and backing tracks while strumming an instrument that has become, to all intents and purposes, a prop. I’m talking about great live music, performed by top musicians who play because they love to play. When you play because you love playing, you entertain because there is an infectious energy in the performance.
I must point out that I am affiliated with Foley’s bar only because I love the place as a punter. I don’t work for the pub. Sure, I’ve been known to puck out the odd sea chanty to the merriment of the assembled bunch, but I’m writing this post because I am an avid fan of the place. This is the only pub running live music 6 nights a week and, on the night that music doesn’t run, it’s common for a group of musicians to just show up and start an impromtu session.
If you love music and you find yourself in Limerick City, head to Foley’s and I guarantee that, as long as you actually like music, you won’t regret it. Venues like Foley’s Bar should not only be supported but applauded for what they’re doing. What would be wonderful is if we could get the big beer companies to lend their support by sponsoring some of the many events going on there, including Foley’s House of Blues - which takes place on the first Tuesday of every month, Foley’s Honky Tonk - the inaugural night happens on the 16th of March with Limerick legend Joe Browne and The Dirty Dawgs, The Beatles Tribute Night - taking place on the 30th of March and planned events like Leonard Cohen Night, Johnny Cash Night, the Night of Guitars and many many more that I’ve heard of.
If you want your brand associated with something real, then support Foley’s