This is hilarious. In fact it’s so hilarious that I actually don’t mind giving the site in questions a bit of exposure. Last week I came across a site that was basically slagging off my fellow blogger and honorary pirate, Bock The Robber. The site in question,
, seems to have been set up to allow multiple contributors to post whatever they wanted about anything. To be honest, it’s an idea I quite like but there’s a major problem with doing something like that; you tend to get morons using it as a platform to utter shite about anything they want.
Ok, here’s the thing. The administrator of the site went to great lengths to express his hatred of any kind of censorship. So how is it then that yer ol Cap’n has been banned from leaving any more comments on his site - this might change if he reads this because, as it turns out, he’s quite economical with the truth.
The post that started all this “controversy” is called
and it is openly and visibly moronic from start to finish. The same moron had written a previous post about how he hates bloggers and users of Facebook, twitter and Myspace. That’s fine; you don’t actually have to like bloggers but why become a blogger to give out about bloggers? That’s beside the point, however, and I’ll get back to the point. Y’see the problem is that I wouldn’t be surprised if, like a cornered rat, the administrator of this, frankly pointless site, deletes the comments in question - even though that’s exactly the kind of behaviour he was condemning in his defence of this moronic post. The writer of the post stated incorrectly that Bock deletes comments that conflict with his own views. Even a cursory look through the comments that are on his site will reveal that this is patently untrue. Still they blew on about how it is a sin to delete anyone’s comment. I can tell you that they did have to delete one comment as it contained personal information and I applaud them for that and will not use that to lend more weight to my own argument. They were right to do this.
Here’s a brief conversation I had with Bock.
Cap’n P: Bock, me oul sagotia, I’ve come across a site that has been attacking you.
Bock: I don’t really give a fuck about that, to be honest.
Cap’n P: Damn yer eyes, Bock, let’s have some fun with these fuckers!
Bock: Look, I’ve a lot of stuff to do at the moment so I wouldn’t have the time to be bothered with that.
Cap’n P: And what if I have a bit of time to spend wiping the floor with these idiots?
Bock: Knock yourself out, Cap’n. I’ve noticed you’ve been a bit bored lately.
So I pointed the Thirsty Kipper at One Blank Page and set sail into battle. To be honest, it would have been easier to do battle with a piece of wood.
When dealing with morons, I like to start off with a lie that will bring the more shaky ones out from the rock under which they have been hiding. I started by telling them that I could see that there were multiple users from looking at their IP addresses. I was called n this lie immediately, which is fair enough I suppose.
Anyhoo, after much tooing and froing, during which I pointed out a couple of home truths, I had an idea. What if I just led them into doing a couple of things in order that their idiocy might be exposed? To be honest I didn’t really expect it to work. I noticed their policy of changing banners and had an idea. What if I forced them to change the banner at my behest? The banner that they had featured a mouth felating the name of the site. The background image of the text was a veiny penis. I took a screenshot of this but, to be honest; it’s a horrible fucking thing so I’m not going to but it up here.
I offered the following comment:
“Actually, your rather lurid and obvious banner already suggests that you’re eating your words.”
They replied thus:
“There’s 13 contributors, and we never mention the b*****.
It’s a good idea not to mention the b*****, because if you do, someone will change it and make your comment look ridiculous.”
Success, they changed the banner. I contacted Bock as it was too hilarious not to and he issued a challenge to me. He suggested that the real trick would be to get them to put it back up. Hhhmmm.
I sailed back to the Island of morons and posted again; “Do you not think that, by changing it, you look ridiculous?”
The hilariously juvenile administrator, Chris P Pancake, replied thus:
I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Now came the time to get them to put the banner back up. I’ll be honest with you; I didn’t actually think they’d do it.
I countered with this:
“Yes, it appears that you have little idea what anyone is talking about. Print screen is a very handy function though. Maybe you should have employed this before Bock deleted your comments. Maybe then you’d have proof to back up your bullshit. Then again, you probably wouldn’t have the balls to show those comments anyway.”
Success seemed unlikely when he came back with this:
I don’t know Bock or his blog, and for that reason I haven’t said anything about him. You seem convinced that I did. I’ve criticised the policy people say he has, because I have strong feelings about censorship. Personally, I’ve never left a comment on Bock’s blog. I never will.
When you came on here and began saying things about other commenters that were blatant lies, I pointed this out.
You’re the only person I ever came across who thinks that 3 + 1 = 3, and the best you can come up with now is a criticism of our beautiful b*****.
Don’t you think it’s time to call it a day?”
I wasn’t beaten yet though:
“When I have a little time to waste and when I’m not using that time to cajole idiots like yourself into exposing themselves as the juvenile morons they are, I’m going to put up a post on my own site with a picture of your original banner on it. To be fair, with the low readership you have, I doubt that there’s anyone reading this who hasn’t seen it already.
As for the act of self defence in your last comment:
“I don’t know Bock or his blog, and for that reason I haven’t said anything about him. You seem convinced that I did. I’ve criticised the policy people say he has”
Now people said the Birmingham six were terrorists but they weren’t. While I would never assume to liken your attack on Bock to those atrocities, it occurs to me that your feelings on censorship far outweigh your complete indifference towards the truth. You believe Bock did this because some other moron told you so? Please. If his comments were deleted, it would’ve been with good reason. Censorship is important, whether you like to think so or not. It stops bigoted fuckers getting their cousin-fucking beliefs in print. You haven’t read Bock’s blog, so your only grounds for attack was hearsay? That, my friend, makes you a moron. That makes you far more insipid than even the strictest censor.”
I waited and waited for what seemed like seconds and then:
“Here, I’ll put it back up, because I think you’ll like this one too.”
I replied thus:
“Ha ha! That is unbelievable. Two for two, Bock!”
So, back at the beginning of the thing, their entire argument against Bock was that he deleted comments by the idiot who wrote the post. The administrator of the blog claimed to have no knowledge of Bock but was responding to beliefs held by others. His tireless defending of his fellow morons was based on his “strong” beliefs on censorship. Here are two comments that set the tone of their argument:
“Of course he can express himself whatever way he likes on his own blog, but if he’s going to delete comments that don’t love and agree with his own, why have a comment section?”
And this one:
“Which is worse, having a blog with an indefensible comments policy, or jumping in out of nowhere to defend someone’s right to have such a policy?
People take this blogging shite way too seriously.
This from someone who claimed to have no knowledge of Bock.
So this guy hates censorship and thinks that people should be allowed to say whatever they like on a site that is privately owned and paid for. Now I know this post has gone on a bit but, y’see, I am now banned from this guy’s site because I disagreed with the administrator of the site. I got banned because of the very thing these idiots were giving out about and they can see neither the irony nor the idiocy of this. It’s the only reason this post exists.
Here’s the last comment that was allowed on the post:
“I’m turning off the comments in this post because it’s sad what some people will jump on and carry on.
Am I sad for attacking Bock? Probably.
Are other people sad for jumping to his defense? I think so. He wasn’t bothered by the post, why should his readers?
Now the conversation has scewed away from the point.
I wonder how many of these comments would have been deleted else where….”
This guy obviously doesn’t think that silencing people is censorship and he’s kind of right; it’s fascism. Now he only allows comments that he likes. He’s gone from hating censorship to being Mr Censorship 2009 in one fell swoop.
What a fucking idiot! If you go back to the first link on this post, you’ll see that Mr Colin Lingus states that he had a choice, whether to close down the blog or review his comments policy. He opted not to close down the blog, which I believe was the wrong choice.