Captain Purplehead

This Link will take you to another moron’s site. I must apologise for directing you to so many of these morons but this one is particularly entertaining as the author aludes to a previous post of mine in which I called the Irish Savant an idiot. I’m confused by this author though. It seems that he/she is defending the racist wanker that is the Irish Savant, yet the name of the blog is Stop The Invasion of Oregon, which surely makes this person a native of Oregon which, naturally must mean they are a native American Indian. Now why a Native American Indian defend a racist dipshit like the Irish Savant? The only conclusion you could come to is that this person is indeed an idiot.
I must warn you that the mumblings of this moron are vile, racist shit. I hate to be the one to drive traffic on to this site but it might be worth your while to drop by and remind this knuckle-dragging dipshit of their idiocy. I’m accused of being a violent, vegan brown shirt on this blog. I must admit that’s a new one on me and I nearly spat out my kitten burger when I saw it.

I’m going to be winding this blog up soon, putting the Thirsty Kipper into dry dock and all that palaver. Oh it’ll still take up it’s paltry bandwidth until my hosts decide otherwise but I won’t be contributing to it anymore. I’ll be moving on, hanging up the cutlass, eyepatch and peg leg and starting something new and deranged, but I’m afraid it’s time to kill off the Cap’n. If any of you have suggestions as to how he should die, let me know - fuck it, I’m really leaving myself open on that one.
The ol foul mouthed, bitter and twisted Cap’n has had some true adventures along the way and has met some people he likes to think of as his ship mates. Bock, Cap’n Dyke, Hangar Queen, Savannah, Darwin, Limerick Gal, Problem Childe Bride and many others and he’ll carry fond memories on his way down to Davey Jones’ locker.
He has also met some truly fucking horrible shitheads along the way. Irish Savant, for one, is a needless waste of oxygen who, along with his moronic small minded, fuck their cousins, dickhead friends, should just take a short walk off a long drop.
While the Cap’n still lives, there’s a couple of things I want to get done.
I’ll be letting you all know soon what I’m on about.

Sometimes you just have to hand it to Radiohead… so…er… I will then

Radiohead do Bond

Radiohead do Neil Young

Radiohead do The Smiths

Radiohead do Joy Dvision

Thom Yorke doing gorgeous

Well folks, it seems that I have become a shadow of my former shadow. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still a fat fucker but I’m now 5lbs lighter than I was before I started this torture diet.
Though the experience began as a torturous and horrible affair, I’ve figured something out. If you like bread - and by like I mean you crave, desire and need bread at least seven times a day - then you’re probably addicted to it. I’ve also figured out that diets are fucking crap. It’s all a load of bollox. If you’re overweight, you just need to crack a few habits.
For example, I’ve completely given up bread and, though I’m 77% more miserable than I was when I started, I’m not building much fat up. If someone gives you a diet sheet, just tear it up, stuff in their mouth and tape it in place for fear they talk any more bollox to you.
I didn’t feel right unless I cleared my over burdened plate. I now eat what I need to eat and much less of it. I’ve discovered that, if I don’t feel hungry, I don’t need to eat. It may sound simple but it’s been a fucking revelation to me.
So there you have it. I’m nowhere near to giving Kate Moss a run for her money but my shoes are slightly happier at the moment.

Having just lambasted the British government for their ludicrous decision to exclud lessons ab0ut the Holocaust in their schools’ history curriculum, I must applaud them on their animal cruelty laws. This is mainly because they have laws against animal cruelty. A police officer is being prosecuted because he left two German Shepherds locked in a car in 29 degree heat, effectively cooking them to death.
The police officer deserves to be prosecuted for cruelty through criminal neglect. Would anything like that happen here? I fucking bet that at least one of the Irish people reading this is probably sniggering and thinking, “they’re only dogs; get over it”. That is because most Irish people couldn’t give a fuck about animals and don’t care whether or not they suffer.
This is yet another facet of Irish society which fucking sickens me. I know a guy who can’t seem to live without having a dog but whenever a dog of his gets sick or reaches 5 or pisses him off or just looks at him funny, he shoots the animal and gets another one. He’s not alone in this. There is so much abject and p0intles cruelty to animals in this country, it’s a wonder most of us aren’t walking around, dragging our knuckles and grunting at passers by… oh, hang on a second, we are.
Dogs aren’t overpopulating the planet. Cats aren’t building weapons of mass destruction. Horses aren’t, to my knowledge, committing genocide, yet we’re cruel to animals and children in this country. Ok, so why pick on animals and children? Could it be that they’re easy targets and we are a nation of snivelling fucking cowards? Well, it certainly seems like it.
I know that some fucking knob is just waiting to say that cow shit creates more greenhouse gases than a fleet of pimped out Humvees. Go on, if you thought it, post it.
Our animal rescue centres get fuck all funding from a government who are far too busy feathering their own nests with our money, yet they continue through hard work and tireless commitment. There’s a group of travellers that I see every day on sulkies pulled by emaciated horses. They hold dog fights and they steal small dogs to give their vicious ones some bloodlust. They’re fucking scum and there are no laws to stop them. In fact, there are no laws preventing travellers from doing whatever the fuck they want, but that’s another rant.
We need laws to stop people being cruel to animals and we need to educate people in the proper care of animals. We don’t own this planet, we share it.

The need to be politically correct has gone too far. Ok, so I’ve never really been politically correct because, if I want to call some a fucking prick, I tend to just that. I’ve just heard that the British minister for education has agreed to take the holocaust off the history curriculum as it may offend the beliefs of Muslims who don’t believe the holocaust happened.
WHAT???? So Auschwitz was just a daycare centre and Treblinka was a holiday resort. If you believe that the holocaust never happened, you’re quite simply a fucking tosspot.
Are we only being politically correct with fucking Muslims now? What about insulting the Jews? What about insulting the families of the victims of the holocaust? What about insulting every fucking right thinking person on the planet who knows that the holocaust DID happen? What about insulting every right thinking Muslim who doesn’t subscribe to extremist and clearly idiotic beliefs like this?
Why don’t we call it what it is? We’re fucking terrified of Muslim extremists. We’re afraid that these slaves to their beliefs might send their children, all strapped up with explosives to blow us innocent people up! Fuck’s sake!!!!
What in the name of fuck is going on here?

Never happened? Wake fucking up you fucking monumentally fucking stupid fucking morons!!!! Of course the stock comeback is that we shouldn’t believe everything we hear and we shouldn’t. In fact, we should vociferously protest at all the untruths we hear. For instance, if someone approaches you and tells you that the holocaust never happened and was in fact staged to garner sympathy for the Jews, just grab this idiot, shake him or her really hard and inform the moron in no uncertain terms that you refuse to accept something simply because it makes it easier for them to hate the Jews. Tell this fucking wall flower to wake up and grow a fucking brain or simply pull the pin when they’re getting dressed for work. That’s all it is. Telling people that the holocaust never happened makes it easier to hate the Jews.
Staunch Catholics deny it’s occurence also but that’s because the people they hold dear were pretty much complicit in what went on WHEN THE HOLOCAUST HAPPENED!!